Tag: ruff-times

The Agreement (Ruff Times #2)

Simon was convinced. Hypnosis wasn’t for him. Adrian was someone he enjoyed meeting, but wouldn’t ever see again. But whether he wants to or not, the truth is that that a single chance encounter has changed him irrevocably, and now he must face the consequences.

The heart wants what the heart wants. Now, Simon must come to terms with the desires that Adrian awakened in him, and he has to decide whether he wants to take the next step and sign an agreement with the man who changed his life.

The Agreement is a 10,000-word short story and part two in a series.

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Excerpt

Whatever it was that Adrian did to him had proven to be a boon. For all the nervousness that Simon still felt about hypnosis, he couldn’t have gotten through midterms without Adrian’s help. His exams had gone by, and he had survived. Now he was feeling more at ease with himself than he ever had, even before all the distress that his current living situation had caused him.

All that Simon could do now was wait, hoping and praying that he hadn’t fucked any of his exams up. Granted, he was feeling pretty confident. He had gone into the tests more assured than he had expected to be. It might have had something to do with the fact that the week leading up to the exam had been one of the best weeks of his life.

For whatever reason, and Simon strongly suspected it had something to do with Adrian, he had simply had a lot more clarity of mind and ability to focus during that week. He had been able to study, and not just study, but study well.

It had even gotten to the point that his friends made jabs at his expense. They had joked about how he was evolving into a nerd. And although it was a bit uncomfortable at times, it had been a positive experience.

For the first time in his life he had been able to look at a book, read it, and remember the content. It was exactly what he’d needed to feel confident about the exams. But a part of him didn’t want to acknowledge that maybe something positive, more than just getting his rocks off, had come from the brief tryst he’d had with Adrian.

In fact, despite the gratefulness that he felt, Adrian was the last thing that Simon wanted to think about right now.

He leaned forward on his desk and drummed his fingers just beside his keyboard. He had found some random messageboard. At first, it had appeared fascinating and all, but it had quickly lost its charm. Right now, he was mostly pretending to read the thread titles, his eyes glazing over as he scrolled down the endless list of discussions, occasionally flicking to a preview image, if there was one.

It was little more than busywork for his mind. Simon needed to keep his thoughts occupied. Adrian was temptation given human flesh, and Simon didn’t want to give the guy any more of a foothold in his head than he already had.

Sure, the one encounter with Adrian had given Simon enough money to save his ass and had given him the chance to find a new job, but he wasn’t out of trouble just yet. The lingering promise of thousands of dollars became more and more appealing as the days wore on, but Simon wasn’t sure as to what he was willing to sacrifice for the much needed money.

To add to his issues, Simon had found going under incredibly arousing, and he didn’t know if he was ready to let go of control that easily. Even if there was something about giving up control that simply got his gears turning. Surrendering his independence and letting someone else muck about in his psyche made his cock twitch, but it was also a concept that terrified him to his core.

It was like there were two different Simons warring in his head. It was a constant source of anxiety that hadn’t, thankfully, bled into his day-to-day life just yet.

But here, at home, where he had very little to do besides surf the web, watch meaningless videos, and jerk off when he got horny, there wasn’t much of anything to keep his mind off of Adrian’s stupid, handsome, charming face.

At work he at least managed to put forward the appearance of being a functional adult, but at home, his concentration had been shot since finishing exams. He couldn’t focus on any one thing for too long before he got distracted, by something else, thoughts of Adrian, or even an insistent, persistent throbbing between his legs.

Simon was horny. He needed to get laid. And yet none of the guys on his dating apps were all that appealing to him. He knew that it was only natural to be feeling this thirsty after working all week on exams, but the fact that he couldn’t bring himself to sleep with anyone else was weird.

Deep down he suspected that Adrian had something to do with it, but he doubted that the guy would stoop to such levels. But the suspicion was there, and it did nothing to help his situation. If anything, it only made him more conflicted about his desire to go back to Adrian’s place and give up control again.

What if this time Adrian took advantage and turned him into a mindless sex slave? Sure, all the literature he’d read pointed to that being impossible to do, but what if? If Adrian truly had something to do with him not finding anyone on his dating apps who he wanted to have sex with, what more could Adrian do to him? But the big question was why the thought of Adrian changing the way his mind worked made him feel so hot and bothered.

And if Adrian could have that much control over him, could he even trust his own thoughts? The fact that he had developed something of a fetish for hypnosis and being changed mentally? What if it was all the result of a suggestion that Adrian had planted in him to make him more pliable?

He was horny, excited, and scared all at the same time. He wanted to trust Adrian. He wanted to sleep with Adrian. And he wanted to run away from Adrian. He was a mess. He liked to think that he wasn’t, but deep down he knew that he was.

If he had known what sort of psychological torment he would put himself through after going under for a stranger, he would have never agreed to Adrian’s offer. But there was nothing he could do about that now.

He sighed and buried his face in his hands. He looked at the messageboard and groaned. He didn’t even remember why he’d found it interesting in the first place. He clicked off of the tab and minimized the browser, but that might have been a mistake. In doing so he attracted his own attention to the other minimized window on his taskbar.

It was a private browsing session, one that he’d opened in a drunken, horny haze a couple of days after midterms. The fact that it existed was a source of constant shame and arousal, but for whatever reason, he couldn’t bring himself to close it.

He’d tried to forget about what was hidden behind that little blinking icon. But he couldn’t. He just couldn’t. Now, after thinking about Adrian and his stupid face and all the stupid things he might have put in Simon’s mind, Simon’s cock was hard and pressing up against his thigh.

Maybe he was overthinking all of this. Maybe he was tormenting himself over nothing. It certainly didn’t feel goodto be living in this constant limbo of anxiety.

What was it that Adrian had told him their first time together? That it was just better to let go? What if he just did. What if for once in his life he stopped trying to control things that were out of control? Hypnosis had felt so good. Letting someone else take over had been so liberating. Maybe he should just ignore the paranoid voice in the back of his head warning him that this wasn’t something he should get into.

Simon sighed. He couldn’t stop thinking about Adrian. He thought about the way that the hypnotist had taken him down, letting him drift deeper and deeper, of his own accord, and at his own pace. He took a deep breath and sighed, just like Adrian had thought him.

He closed his eyes and imagined all the stress and all the anxiety just flowing out of him as he exhaled.

His cock throbbed against his leg. He was getting hornier. His eyes fluttered open, but he felt better. He wasn’t in some blissful stupor like what he’d experienced at Adrian’s, but he felt better equipped to handle his own mind.

His left hand wandered away from the keyboard and slipped down into his pants. He massaged his cock through his underwear and moaned softly. He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes as he stroked himself. Was it really so bad to just surrender to his urges? to give in to his desires?

Adrian had shown him that no, it wasn’t bad at all. If anything, giving in was good. And so what if Adrian changed him? Adrian, he suspected, had given him the ability to study well and focus on his academics. Even if Adrian had planted a secret love of hypnosis in his head, was that really so bad?

For once in the weeks since he had last seen the hypnotist, he let himself remember how things had turned out at Adrian’s house. It had felt so good to just let go. It had felt so good to give himself entirely into someone else’s control.

Sure, it had been scary, but Adrian had done nothing to make Simon doubt his trust. And Adrian had gone out of his way to make Simon comfortable. All the conflict he had been feeling so far could simply be the result of him conditioning himself to the idea that he liked to be in control, to the notion that there was something terrifying about letting someone else take the reins.

And sure, there was definitely something to fear in that liminal space in between consciousness and unconsciousness, a definite potential for abuse, he knew that he was doing himself more harm than good by denying that this wasn’t something he wanted badly. He was being unnecessarily harsh on himself by refusing to acknowledge that maybe, just maybe, he could enjoy the titillating sensation of total surrender.

Simon decided that he couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t handle the anxiety. The denial. Thinking that every thought was planted in his head. He knew it would destroy him if he kept it up, so he just let it go. He let his right hand navigate to that private browsing session. He pulled it open. Hypnosis videos, MP3s, written inductions, they were now all at his fingertips, and all he could feel was excitement and arousal.

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New Heat (Ruff Times #1)

Suffering from more financial troubles than he cares to keep track of, Simon briefly considers taking up a somewhat shady ad put up by a person willing to pay a lot of money for a willing erotic hypnosis subject, but ultimately ends up rejecting it out of wariness.

But as luck would have it, he meets Adrian, the man who put the ad up, when he heads out to try and find solace in alcohol or sex. Desperate and with nothing to lose, Simon agrees to experience being put under just once, as a taste of what is possible, before he decides whether to take things any further. He discovers that he might like it much more than he thinks.

New Heat is a 9,900-word short story and first in a four-part series.

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Excerpt

Erotic Hypnosis: Willing Subject Wanted.

It sounded like a simple enough deal, but it scared Simon. The five grand attached to it was very attractive, especially given his current situation. But he couldn’t afford the distraction of the ad. He felt like he would be better off looking for a real job. And he certainly felt like going under and letting some stranger he didn’t know root around in his head was the worst kind of idea.

The money was good. Really good. But he didn’t think that the risk was worth it. He closed out of the tab and rubbed his face, his shoulders slumping forward. He dropped his pen on the notebook that was laying open by his keyboard, and slammed the thing shut.

He yawned, stretching his arms over his head. He blinked blearily. He felt tired. So tired. He looked at the clock on the bottom right hand corner of his desktop and realized that it had only been an hour since he last looked.

Midterms were just over the horizon, and he couldn’t even find the willpower to concentrate. It was a big problem. But he just couldn’t bring himself to study. He somehow managed to find an excuse every time he started, but the truth was that there was simply too much on his mind. The finer points of memory allocation and garbage collection in certain programming languages, in particular, weren’t pretty high up on his current list of priorities.

Times were tough for pretty much everyone in town. A local auto plant had just shut down, leaving hundreds without a job, and the university students who needed the money were left facing even tighter competition than usual. Simon felt like it was a big “fuck you, in particular,” from the universe.

He doubted that the cosmos actually had anything against him specifically, but it was hard not to think that. He had had few good things to say about his old job at a local diner, and more bad things than he cared to think about, but it had at least been a source of income to put bread on the table and pay the rent.

His job had never really earned him enough money to justify putting even a little in his savings account for emergencies just like this one, but the hours had been flexible, and he’d felt that quality was exactly what he needed to prioritize, being a working student.

The more that he thought about it, the more he realized that the low pay never really justified the amount of abuse he’d had to endure. Working at the till in the small local diner, where he’d had the displeasure of being hired, had no doubt been one of his worst experiences. But, as he had back then, he told himself that beggars couldn’t be choosers.

Things had been bad before everything went downhill, but the townspeople had seemed especially cranky after the plant closed down. Simon couldn’t blame them for being stressed, but he definitely could blame them for not having even the slightest shred of human decency.

Whatever, he thought to himself, it was useless to ruminate on the past since he couldn’t well do anything to change it. It looked, to him, that the trade-off he’d made between salary and working hours was coming back to bite him in the ass. Here he was, a week away from midterms and two away from rent, with no source of income whatsoever to speak of.

Maybe he should have listened more to his father prattling on about the importance of good money management, but that meant recognizing that the mountain of credit card debt he was buried under, which was ruining his future without even trying, piled on top of rent and overdue cellphone bills, was all his fault.

Simon just wanted to drop everything and scream, but that sounded too much like giving up to him. Although he’d never really given much stock to his deadbeat father’s “lessons” over the years, perseverance was somehow the one thing he’d managed to take out of all of it.

Things would have been so much easier if he had instead picked up the value of running back home to mommy and daddy when the going got tough financially. But no, he had to train himself to never give up, no matter how hard the problem facing him was.

Simon picked up his notebook and shoved it into his backpack with a huff. He would just have to find some time to study tomorrow. As it was, he didn’t see a point in trying to study since he was pretty sure nothing was going to stick, anyway. It was pretty telling that in the last hour, he hadn’t managed to jot down anything substantial apart from the headings of the different modules the test was supposed to cover.

Not to mention, he’d already forgotten everything he’d read up on earlier in the day, so he was back to square one, anyway.

He fished his phone out of his pocket and thumbed through the texts he’d been pointedly ignoring for the last hour in a vague attempt to actually look and feel like he was a half-decent student. It hadn’t worked, obviously, and now he was beginning to regret it given that his friends were making noise about going out for the evening.

He sent a tentative message asking if the guys were going to go through with their plans and got back an affirmative in response. “Oh, fuck it,” he murmured, threading his fingers through his hair. He was going to go. He would figure things out at some other time.

Right now, what he needed was a stiff drink and a cute boy to take him home. He wasn’t going to take any boys to his place because God knew his apartment stank to high heaven of desperation and misery. He wouldn’t have taken himself home, much less some poor guy he wanted to get it on with.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out the last of his cash. He had a few crumpled singles and a Canadian twenty he’d gotten from his great aunt his last birthday. He looked at his jar of change, but even that had been sucked almost dry by his indulgences over the past year.

In total, he had in his hands, about eight dollars and thirty two cents in loose change. He didn’t count the Canadian twenty because he was pretty sure that none of the local establishments would take it, anyway. But he imagined he could get some use out of it.

• • •

“Hey.”

Simon nearly fell out of his seat at the bar, the voice startling him out of whatever stupor he’d let himself sink into over the last few minutes. Someone slipped into the stool next to his and swiveled around to face him. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see a tall guy wearing a cardigan, a nice, light blue shirt, and khakis.

He thought that the guy was talking to someone sitting on the other side of him so he looked over his shoulder, only to realize that the other stool was empty. He blinked, not really sure how to act, not sure how to process the fact that someone had approached him despite his bumbling attempts at conversation up until then.

“You don’t seem to be having a great time,” said the other guy. He wasn’t bad looking. He looked to be Simon’s type, in all actuality. He looked young, probably in his late twenties or early thirties, had messy brown hair, really nice green eyes, and full lips that Simon couldn’t help but fantasize about kissing.

“Me?” said Simon, barking a laugh as he nursed the glass of bourbon that the bartender had slid in his direction a few minutes ago. Supposedly it was from a lad “in the corner,” but he’d looked, and there definitely hadn’t been a lad there. He chose to believe that the boy had just gone away, too shy to appear to him, as opposed to the drink being given him out of pity.

He lifted the glass to his lips and took a sip. He savored the light burn on his lips and tongue, though not really appreciating the reminder that he’d had no success thus far tonight. “I’m having a great time,” he said, taking another sip. He gave the drink a quick swirl before setting it back down on the bartop, the ice clinking against the sides.

“Yep…” he said, in the driest tone he could muster. “Just peachy.”

“Mhm,” said the other man, lips pursed but not in a critical way. At least, Simon didn’t think so. The guy held out a hand and said, “My name’s Adrian.”

Simon felt pretty stupid just staring at the hand that had been proffered in greeting. He wasn’t sure what to make of it. Adrian was, as far as his success was going that night, a veritable unicorn that had come out of nowhere. He briefly considered that he was just having hallucinations, but Adrian didn’t seem to be a figment of his imagination.

Simon doubted that his imagination could come up with such a hot guy all on its own. He grabbed Adrian’s hand and said, “I’m Simon.”

“Are you going to do that Canadian money thing for me?” said Adrian.

Simon blinked. “Excuse me. What?”

“Your Canadian money schtick,” said Adrian. “I have to give it to you, very creative.” Simon sighed. Great. Sure, trying to pick up guys or get free drinks by striking up conversation using facts he’d hastily looked up online about Canadian money was not the best idea, but Simon was sure that it could have worked. At some point. The last thing that he needed was someone to mock him to his face for it.

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